Bereft.

How long does it take before you realize that someone is gone? Not out the door or on a holiday - just gone - ceased to exist.
How long will it take before the online telephone directory will erase the telephone number - I haven't erased it from my cell phone - My dear friend hasn't even erased it from her own cell phone - She is still thinking of calling to see if it still has a voice message so that she can hear the voice again - Is the voice still there?
There was a flight scheduled to the Capitol City that night - Someone took an earlier flight.
A dark road. Two cars. One angel.
My dear friend won't forget. She may have a scattered mind but she won't forget. Memories may fade - but you can never forget.

32146-22

Suddenly things don't seem that important. I mean it's been more than a week but you are ok. It's hard but your ok. My wishes still count in my own world because they don't stop existing. Things move on. Life is short and you got to work hard and fast for your wishes to come true so…

My Shallow Wishes:
I wish I had band members so I could present my songs as they are and not alone with a guitar and playback…
I wish I could release a CD so that I could thank all of you…
I wish to hear my music on the radio…
I wish someone would sign me...
I wish of lots of other things…

It's just Saturday again and nothing to do, no money to spend and no TV to watch (shitty shows & movies). I can even feel happy when I think of how painless these issues are… That's right. Remember to be happy. Life is too short - remember to smile :-)

Love,
Sara


Preoccupation

To update the recording situation:
I've been preoccupied with things.
First of all - one of the songs - Wolflike They Are - got into trouble by being in the wrong key when I was supposed to add vocals and finalize the whole deal……… I went blank and had to leave it all behind for a while but now I'm back in action and will finalize the recording ASAP.
Secondary - I've been in the studio with David & the Citizens - adding some vocals and also one or two ideas… Their sound has evolved and changed - in a good way. Davids song writing is one factor. The fact that Andreas Söderlund (of Niccokick and Sounds Like Violence) has done a great job producing, is another.

32146-21

A promise:
Will get back to you as soon as the finishing is near… Those of you who have had e-mail contact with me
will receive an e-mail. Those of you who wish to receive an e-mail, e-mail me at:

sara (at) thecitizens (dot) nu

Keep with me here.
Love,
Sara


The Recording Process

More than half way through recording the new demo. Sounds weird.
I have discovered something about my recording process - It never turns out the way I intended. The thing is; I have this picture and vague melody in my head whilst writing the songs. The form and figure is there but very faint. So. When I start to record the songs I start to wonder what the hell am I creating?! I keep asking myself what it is that's exiting my head in the shape of a song 'cause I don't recognize the tangible song from the one I pictured in my head when writing. Am I making any sense?
Well. The bass yesterday. I just did it impressionistically instead of following a melody already made up. Suddenly it was there, channel 4 on my porta studio.
This THING, this situation kind of makes it hard for me to be excited about my new songs because I never know how they will end up. I'm always criticizing and analyzing them. More now than ever before. I really became aware of this phenomenon whilst being in the process of "At Least Like Melissa" and that song turned out to be one of my favorite songs so I'm not really worried, just confused.
The tracks I'm recording:

  • Jupiter and I
  • Wolflike They Are
  • Wicked Autumn Kiss
  • I Bleed You Tonight
Thanx to David for adding analog drums on two of the songs. I love you always.

So anyway. I'm on schedule and I will probably have the new demo out within two weeks.
"At Least Like Melissa" will be on it.
I hope you'll be here when it's done.

Sincerely,
Sara