Swarming and Full Camel

This town is swarming of bad people with opinions built out of lies. I can't keep hiding all my life and every time I go out I feel I have to hide. Like leprosy it spread and I wonder if the people carrying the opinions are aware of the amount of falseness in them. I see relatives, girlfriends and followers to the people, all of them whom I'd rather vanish from forever. I get sick to my stomach. Some of them even try to say hi in a certain tone and I wonder if it is to spite me and/or make me insecure. I just really need to be gone from here. Hopefully then I could write something else on this blog other than this. Hopefully I could regain my self-esteem and record some songs for you again. I have a lot written but not the belief in myself to go forth with the recordings. I also feel this DISTURBING feeling of limitation when writing on this blog. I mean - I can't even write about the true meaning of my songs 'cause I'm afraid that if I do, The people - The non-faces, will start writing wicked lies and start spreading them over the net again. There is already to much BS out there...

On another note - What helps me, as some of you might have read earlier, is yoga and the type of yoga for me is Bikram Yoga. I've been practicing yoga for about ten years and my first Bikram Yoga class was in 2003 in Stockholm. It took two and a half to three years before I could start to practice it regularly here in Malmö. This past year I've been practicing almost every day. Here is my favorite posture. In Bikram Yoga it's called Full Camel - Poorna Ustrasana. Backbending in yoga is powerful and it involves a lot of feelings getting stirred up before they get cleared. I could go on forever about that but I just wanted to share something that's not about trouble... If Camel posture rearranges your feelings then imagine the feeling of getting cleared up in this Full Camel. It really makes me be able to breath again.


Picture from bikramyoga.com


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